My Friends - OR - Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda

MePalin troupe cramming for Tuesday's FINAL EXAM

When you don't have anything good to say, make sure you're on camera when you say it.
(Remember: Extra pointage for bulging veins)

Spewing nonsense and divisiveness has kept this race close. Keep it going.
(You never know, some undecided voter might not know that B.O. is Black, might not have heard of Ayers or Wright...)

When you're pointing fingers at the opponent, nobody is looking at you and what you've done. Point baby point! And do NOT under any circumstance, open your own closet door.

There are many ways to run a campaign. Try to do them all in the same soundbite.

My Friends, I came into this `not getting it'. If polls and trends and comments are any indicator, I still ain't getting it.

The only thing we have left is fear. When showing yours, try to project it, catapult it...

When you HATE government, you're probably not the best choice to RUN the Government.
Try to hide your contempt.