Saturday, December 19, 2009

Freedom -OR- You'd Think It Would Be Liberating.

Just another day in Opposite World.

"What could possibly go wrong?"
grumble, grumble
"Yes Sir? You. in the second row with the pained expression... You wanted to say something?"

Actually no, I'd rather not, but those FIVE words display a shallowness of thinking that defies credulity.

In less than time than it took you to say them I managed to come up with ten MAJOR elements of your so-called plan that could go horribly, painfully and expensively WRONG. Not the least of which is the murkiness of your cost estimates.

I agree it is an admirable concept and would, in a FUNCTIONING system, have a shot at lessening the inconveniences experienced by hundreds, perhaps thousands, of villagers... alas, that the plan hinges on system function of a system that has ceased functioning. Do you see where I'm going here?...

"But wouldn't it be nice?"

Sure, nice like a puppy. Cute and cuddly too. Then it pisses and shits all over. Then chews and shreds all the pissy, shitty stuff and disperses the shit bits and piss-soaked shards over the whole place. So that a few people can enjoy CONVENIENCE?

"Still, for those people it would be nice."

Okay, sure, but unless you are some sort of wizard, you will not limit the obvious downsides or costs. It's not like we haven't played this game before you know.
The puppy turns into a dog who whines and barks and humps inappropriately and you, being the picky sort, jettison the dog to the pound. Have you been to the pound?
It's FULL of the whims and stellar thinking of countless idjits like you.

"This time will be different. It's unfair of you to judge future by past."

Hmmm, unfair? How silly of me. I should ignore an almost endless succession of costly, ill-conceived and poorly implemented plans and simply trust you that this time will be different? You know what Sparky, why don't you fix just one of THOSE clusterfucks before you roll out this latest endeavor?

"This exact plan has been successfully implemented in other places. I've read dozens of accounts of success."

So now you're admitting that this is not even an ORIGINAL idea? You copied it?
Without knowing that other system's function, personnel or process? Without adjusting for the differences in those places and THIS place? You're assuming it's Plug and Play? No muss, no fuss, nothing underpinning THEIR success that doesn't exist here?

And still you wonder why I might grumble?

"Well, we plan to vote on this. I know I have the three votes needed to pass it."

Okay, Jean Luc... Make It So. I hope you won't mind if I sit over there and laugh when the wheels fall off... Yep, one more law oughta do it...

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